How to Get Free of Expectations

Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about my life exactly a year ago. My husband and I’s first anniversary is coming up this week and as I reflect back on those days, I’m still amazed at how smoothly it all went despite the unexpected circumstances. You see, the date of our ceremony changed rather suddenly so it went from being 6 weeks away to only 6 days away! Thankfully, we have THE BEST family and everything ended up coming together perfectly.

As we circle back to the same time this year, I’m remembering the magic of what happened when I let go of my expectations and focused on what truly mattered.

I don’t always love the process of planning, but I do love having a plan. And, of course, I prefer for things to go according to that plan. I can go with the flow… as long as it’s flowing in the general direction that I anticipate. But when things go in the total opposite direction… well, I’ve wasted a lot of time and energy fighting the change in course instead of using them to reroute myself.

Throughout the years, I’ve gotten a lot more comfortable at navigating through change and dealing with the unexpected. Thanks to many experiences of things NOT going according to plan, it doesn’t feel like my world is crumbling apart every time these things come up now. But I definitely fall back into this struggle sometimes – especially when it’s got to do with something I’ve been planning for a while.

So, last year, when I learned that I was getting married in 6 days instead of the 6 weeks that I’d been expecting, it was a surprise to find that I wasn’t freaking out. Somehow, my tendency to fight the change was absent. Instead, I had this comforting sense that it was all happening the way it was supposed to. There were a couple of overwhelming moments in the week, but for most of it, I felt really at peace.

All week long, I kept wondering what made it possible for me to react so calmly? How did I come to accept this major change with such ease?

There was something about the abruptness of the shift in plans that woke me up. It reconnected me with the only part of this story that really mattered – getting married. Letting go of my expectations around the situation got easy as soon as I recognized what I cared about most. It wasn’t about how it was happening anymore…. Just that it was happening. We were getting married.  

That’s the thing with expectations. If we’re not careful, we can confuse them with what really matters. We can get so caught up in the expectations that we give all our attention and energy to details that aren’t very important to us. And the true essence behind our “grind” gets lost. We become disconnected from the real reason we’re working so hard in the first place.

But when we do hold on to the true essence and core purpose behind a goal or plan, it’s so much easier to keep our focus where it belongs. And also to roll with the punches when the not-so-important details change.

Letting go of expectations makes room for us to focus on the true purpose behind our grind. It allows us to spend our precious energy on making it happen instead of trying to control every detail about how it happens.

Now I’m turning it over to YOU!

Have you had any unexpected circumstances arise recently? How did you react?

What’s the core purpose behind the plans/goals you’re working on these days?

I’d love to hear back from you in an email or in the comments!

Peace and blessings,

Hanaa

P.S. – Are you feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or uninspired by your life? Is there a challenge you’re facing or goal you’d like to work towards? If you’re ready to take a bold, true leap in your life, I can help you. Click here to schedule a FREE discovery session with me.

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Get the Bold True Life Toolkit!
  1. Bold Peace Meditation: Sometimes, living boldly takes courage and getting uncomfortable. Invite calm back in with this short and sweet (3 minute) guided meditation.
  2. Bold Leap Journal Prompts: 25 Questions to get clear, confident, and free of overwhelm when you're thinking about making a bold new move in life.
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